April 4, 2011
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I miss my friends at Bikram… Yoga team…
It has been several months now and I have to say it, I miss my friends from Bikram yoga. I bump into them all the time as the studio where I take Ashtanga is the same studio where the Birkam (Hot) yoga studio is offered. I am friends with one of the owners and she is hysterical. My favorite FAVORITE yoga moment over the course of now~ six years was when my friend was teaching the class and I was getting into Garudasana (Eagle, shown above by Bikram). When she saw the quantity of drama instead of efficient movement I was using to get into the pose and said “Candace ~ WHAT THE HELL, this isn’t your interpretive dance class”. I didn’t fall at that moment but I almost had to excuse myself while I laughed to the point of tears!! I miss the silliness, the camaraderie and my buddies (although I do enjoy time outside the studio with a few of them).
I can’t do Bikram right now because the heat is too hard on my adrenals. My adrenals cause terrible joint pain, I mean some days it is my knee and elbow and other days it is everything, including feet, hands, wrists, hips ~ ug. Ashtanga is so hard on my knees that I have now counted three classes where I just start to cry from the pain. Bikram on the other hand only has really one pose, toe stand that would be tough on my knee.
I like Ashtanga and Iyengar better than I like Bikram yoga. It is change, new, exciting. I like Ashtanga better than Iyengar however the Iyengar classes help me in Ashtanga as I get a chance to get into the poses with props so I can feel what I am trying to do in Ashtanga. Unfortunately, because of my demanding schedule right now, I can’t make it to Iyengar and won’t be able to again until May. That is OK, it is a long yoga journey.
Still, I miss my buddies. After you have gone for a long time, you have a sort of “yoga team”. You watch new people progress and are proud of big moments for them. You see if your friends need a hand or just sharing of electrolytes or a hello. You move your mat and make space for people and they for you when someone is running late and after a stressful day, that is a great act of kindness. It is yoga, you share and the group energy is powerful and you are focused on energy because you know the postures well so you go within. When you are weak you find more inner strength and you can feel the group strength in the room and that inspires you to do more. I can see in Ashtanga that group of people that have been practicing together and have that rapport. It is a significantly smaller and younger group than in Bikram and I am not a part of it. That doesn’t diminish my experience but what I am pointing out is what can enhance your experience.
I hate to admit it but I miss the mirrors too. It was a wierd dimension of Bikram yoga but I get it now. I could watch the details of my postures, and as I am into visualization, I would learn and improve and see myself do the poses before I could actually do them. I feel like a big dork in Ashtanga but I wish that I could see myself improve. Even for the expense of seeing how much my yoga has slipped since I am in so much pain. I can’t enjoy small victories and I don’t have a team anymore.
I miss my friends at Bikram yoga, especially since I am suffering and I know I could get strength from them. I miss my yoga team.
